Unplugged

Apologies for the recent radio silence.  As my last post indicated, we moved from our wonderfully cushy extended-stay hotel with full amenities into our "permanent" digs which, well, require a little work.  Especially in terms of internet service.  Coupled with the fact that I flushed my iPhone down the toilet -- yes, I've been able to keep my two previous cheap cell phones for years upon years, but manage to ruin my first nice smart-phone within one month -- this means I've been pretty much incommunicado with everyone besides TJ, Matt, and my new best friend the unfortunate internet repairman.

But we are limping back to life here, and of course still doing some blog-worthy things, just without the ability to blog about them.  Topics that may be expanded in future posts include...

• TJ's new big-girl crib, purchased in a transaction completed entirely through mime between Matt/me and the salespeople at the Chinese version of Macy's
• IKEA, where upper-class Chinese families bring picnic baskets and spend a day camping out in the various room arrangements on the showroom floor
• My discovery of the WalMart of Shanghai, totally my new favorite hangout
• TJ the ambassador
• Delicious things: fruit juice redefined, Cantonese BBQ, warm water (yep!), and that-candy-that-might-be-gum-but-I-keep-swallowing-it-anyway
• The Wire, as in the best TV show ever
• How Not to Get a Package from the USA to China
• TJ's first swimming pool adventure

So there's a hint of what we've been up to lately.  Hope to write more (with photos! and video!) soon.

New Home

We moved over the weekend.  Easiest move of our lives; we just jumped buildings to the one right next door.  And it was made even easier considering we don’t have our shipment yet so we only had to contend with our 12 pieces of roller-luggage from our flight.  You know it’s a quick move when you can even take your ice cubes!

I’ll do the proper apartment tour once we have a chance to settle and there’s something to see beyond the current mess.  In the meantime, I thought I’d introduce our apartment complex, which hasn’t changed since we just moved within it.  There are 21 buildings in the gated complex, ranging from mid-rise to high-rises, and all sharing a parking garage (underground) and clubhouse (central).

Val's new hangout

The clubhouse is awesome, and frankly it’s the main reason we picked this complex as our choice of residences.  Fairly standard to any Shanghai clubhouse is the gym and indoor pool, but I think ours are especially beautiful, which will hopefully inspire us to use those facilities more often.

Matt's new hangout

 

Additionally, this clubhouse has a whole series of other services and rooms, including party spaces, a spa, a golf simulator, a “band practice” room, and the icing on the cake: a huge indoor gymnasium including basketball courts, volleyball/tennis, and a rock climbing wall!

Lamborghini, anyone?

Rumor is that Yao Ming retired into one of the penthouses on the fancier lake-facing side of the complex, so Matt’s dream is to play a game of pickup against him one day.  Another rumor is that Jackie Chan owns one of the duplex penthouses as well.  Regardless, we have some ridiculously wealthy neighbors, as is evident by their choice of vehicles.

Now that we've moved out of our extended-stay hotel and into a real apartment where we'll live for at least a year, I’m excited to organize and decorate with a sense of “permanence.”  Once we get our shipment of familiar things from the states, we can really complete the settling-in process.  For now, it’s just nice to enjoy living in this beautiful, friendly complex that is already beginning to feel like home.

Foreign Food: passionfruit

Perhaps the simplest culinary adventure in any foreign place is sampling the unfamiliar local fruits.  Some may remember that I chronicled my discovery of dragon fruit in Bangladesh on our previous blog.  Well, the fruit explorations have begun again.

This time, we began with a fruit we’re familiar with by name and juice, but never as a whole piece of fruit.  The passionfruit is an odd little guy.  Its exterior looks like a wrinkly plum, and feels like a half-deflated stressball.

Once cut open, however, it reveals its mushy, super-juicy guts.  After I cut into the first one, upon looking at the opened fruit I announced to Matt that this one had spoiled.  But apparently, this is what to expect.

We scooped out the seeds, and quickly realized that one passionfruit is too tiny to be worthwhile.  So we cut and scooped through our little collection.

Sadly, the rind is simply discarded.  We were left with the passionfruit guts, which taste – shockingly... – like passionfruit juice, something akin to a mix of orange and pineapple juice.  The difference from the plain juice, though, is that the whole fruit has textures: the seeds have crunch like a pomegranate, and there’s also a pulpiness reminiscent of fresh-squeezed orange juice.  Yum!

A toast to Friday

Friday!  Yes, even stay-at-home-parents experience the "TGIF feeling," because for most of us, this provides the hope that we'll convince our partners to enjoy some child-bonding time while we do laundry  shave our legs  read a book  sleep!  In anticipation of a relaxing two-parent weekend, we begin a Friday of celebration.

This past Friday, Tyler and I attended a massive playgroup.  The weather in Shanghai has recently taken a turn towards the bearable, so the usual small indoors playgroup moved outside to a local park and became a massive swarm of babies, blankets, toys, and over-eager moms with cameras.
  

Want to create chaos in China?  Gather 20 babies in a public park.

I wish this photo captured the uniquely “Chinese” element of old men standing right at the edge of our group, pointing and gawking as they chain-smoke cigarettes.  Because obviously, the best place to puff clouds of carcinogens is right over the innocent crowd of babies with developing lungs.  Several of the mommies either were Chinese or fluent in Mandarin, and yet nothing they said could convince these men that they were not welcome to join us.  But I digress…

After the babies' playgroup, we attended mamas’ playgroup in a friend’s apartment courtyard.  It was similar to our previous engagement, with one distinct addition: wine!

Cheers to a bottle that's meant for adults!

Above you see yours truly; Jade, the New Yorker who owns a spa back in San Fran; Victoria, the English woman married to a Portuguese man who has spent the past eight years in Egypt; and Nishtha, who had been a professional in Shanghai for six years until she gave birth to her one-year-old son.  It’s intriguing to me how we’ve all arrived at this place – parenting in Shanghai – with such different reasons, backgrounds, experiences, and emotions.  So we toast to a world that somehow becomes both bigger and smaller with each new friend we meet.  And, of course, we toast to Friday.

NFL Mommies

I joined an online community of expatriate mothers living in Shanghai, and through their myriad articles, forums, and events, I have found the cheapest diapers, healthcare options, parks for tiny tots, and lots of playgroups.  Not to mention friendships with women who share many of my “adventures” as we raise young children in an unfamiliar city in a foreign country.

Amidst the message board chats dominated by debates regarding the best schools, pediatricians, and ayis (hired help for cooking/cleaning/childcare – definitely the most contentious topic in these circles), one posting in particular stood out for me in the digest email this week:

Mamas, any NFL fans?  

 And it was the most frequented forum of the day!

So this morning, a group of American mothers in China hastily shuttled their kids off to school and their husbands off to work, and headed for the one sports bar in town, where they are drinking beers and watching the Saints/Packers game live at 8:30am.

Just one reason why I love these tenacious ladies.

Milestones

TJ is 3 months old today!

 And what an adventure this kid has had in her first three months of life.

In her short time here with us, Tyler has already met all six of her grandparents, plus her Great-GrandPapa.  She has also met all of her aunts (2), uncles (3), and cousins (4 + the one who’s arriving any day now!), as well as two great aunts, two great uncles, and two second cousins.  She has met too many friends – adult and baby alike – to even begin to count.

Tyler is already a well-traveled baby.  She has visited 4 states in the US, in addition to calling two countries “home”.  Tyler has slept in nine different beds, ranging from her Grammy’s own antique baby cradle to the plastic bin where we stored extra linens.  She has traveled by taxi – both NY and Shanghai – bus, subway, car, van, plane, and even gondola.

Our pint-sized party animal has attended two parades: Gay Pride in NYC, and the rehearsal for the Moon Festival parade here in Shanghai.  She's been golfing, shopping, and picnicing, and has behaved herself at over ten restaurants.  Tyler has a global wardrobe, with outfits from the Netherlands, England, New York, Boston, New Mexico, Arizona, DC, California, Colorado, and now here (and not just MADE in China, but BOUGHT in China).  She’s had people speak to her in English, French, Dutch, Spanish, Mandarin, and Shanghainese.

Tyler's eyes have shifted from deep sapphire to royal to almost sky-blue.  Her hair has slowly transitioned from a brunette monk-like hairline to patchy peach fuzz to a very thin layer of strawberry-blonde locks.  She has figured out how to suck her thumb and grab her toes.  She has at least one hundred different facial expressions that characterize her every mood, and she’s recently acquired a whole vocabulary of noises that she uses to delight us with stories or voice her complaints.

TJ continues to amaze us constantly.  I feel very blessed to watch this precious, gentle, easygoing, curious, strong, funny, cheerful child as she learns and grows and becomes more of her own person with each passing day.

Obstacles

Today was a day where nothing was easy.
But despite the obstacles of...

switching jobs,

moving,

being without our belongings which are stuck in a US port,

the apartment hunt,

international bank account limitations,

tricky work/residence permits,

new phones,

new SIM cards that are apparently illegal,

long waits on customer service lines to explain to someone in English that we didn’t know said SIM cards weren’t registered,

insurance with confusing information and lengthy applications,

a lack of US vaccines in China,

$850 plane flights to Hong Kong to get vaccines,

the “dating” scene all over again with other moms and couples,

the hunt for familiar food in unfamiliar grocery stores,

cooking with one pan and high-tech no-instruction appliances,

a combo washer/dryer that seems to require 4 hours per tiny load of laundry,

strange currency with an exchange rate that tests my mental math abilities,

tax laws, regulations, and bureaucracy to make your head spin,

motorbike-heavy traffic with no regard for pedestrians,

curious strangers with no regard for personal space (especially a baby’s),

language barriers,

“Shanghai stomach”,

filtered water that is apparently still unsafe/unhealthy to drink,

relentless mosquitoes,

oppressive heat and humidity thick enough to cut with a knife,

baby poop explosions in front of a crowd of gawking locals & tourists,

baby poop covered clothing in tiny combo washer/dryers that take 4 hours,

adjusting to a stay-at-home-mom routine and identity,

and wishing for an instruction manual on parenting, living abroad, and staying sane…

one peek in at this bundle of peace and joy and unconditional love & understanding, and I remember what is important.